for what it's worth

Yesterday I went back to the doc to see about changing my depression medicine. Every winter I struggle, the worst months are December through March due to the really cold ugly days we tend to have. I don't function well when I'm stuck inside, I NEED to be in the sun soaking up it's mighty rays. (Not good for a pasty white girl but oh well) I must be part cat... So, back to the doctor visit. The reason I went is because I've started withdrawing--just ask my hubby, poor guy, and you could probably ask my friends too. I received a text from a close friend last week asking if I was OK because she hadn't heard from me in a while. I've also been dealing with severe migraines due to the crazy weather and wind we've been experiencing. I've had a hard time getting out of bed too. No motivation to do anything, every task feels like I'm climbing Mount Everest. Sometimes I feel all alone but I know this is not true. I am surrounded by my family and friend

Island Island I see you in the distance  I feel that your existence  Is not unlike my own  Island they say no man is like you  They say you stand alone  Sometimes I feel that way too  It's the need for love  Heart and soul accompaniment  Seems to make me different from you  Chorus:  Well I tried to book passage, but you have no ports  And I tried to sail in, but your wind and waters  Tore my sails and broke all my oars  Island I see you in the moonlight  Silhouettes of ships in the night  Just make me want that much more  Island I see you in all of my dreams  Maybe someday I'll have the means to reach your distant shores  When the need for love  Heart and soul accompaniment  No longer makes me different from you  Chorus:  Well I tried to build bridges  But they all fell down  And I've taken to the air on wings of silver  But I always hit the ground  Well I tried to book passage, but you have no ports  And I tried to sail in, but your wind and waters  Tore my sails and broke

This is how I feel about turning 40! It's my last day of being 39. I have never looked forward to a birthday so much. Well, except maybe the monumental one of my youth, but I have to tell ya, 40 looks pretty darn good to me. For the first time in probably 10-12 years I feel healthy. Even before the Ulcerative Colitis diagnosis in 2004, my health was a constant roller coaster. I've seen more doctors and specialist than the average person under the age of 40.  Turning 40 is a major mile marker for anyone. It signifies the beginning of midlife. Adulthood is in full swing and there is no denying it at 40.  I don't plan on having the traditional midlife crisis now but, I do intend to live everyday abundantly. Life is short. I've come to realize this not just by my own close call with death, but by experiencing the loss of many special friends and family who died way too young. As far as I can tell, the years keep getting better and I plan to enjoy each new day in